How to Plan Your Wedding Day
‘Control freak’ is actually a compliment…
If you want the smoothest wedding day possible, here’s the simplest advice I can give you:
Plan it backwards.
Not spreadsheets. Not Pinterest timelines. Just start at the end and work your way calmly back to the beginning. I’ll give you some rough thumbnail timings here. They’re not rules, they’re guides.
If this feels a bit back-to-front, scroll to the bottom and read upwards.
Massive caveat: Always work with your venue on dinner service, turnaround times, and curfews. They do this every week. But also, stand firm on the things that matter to you.
Start at the end of the schedule: The First Dance
Let’s say your first dance is at 8pm.
That usually means evening guests are invited for 7pm. (realistically closer to 7.30pm once hugs and hellos happen). You’ll probably want a little breather after dinner before the evening begins.
Time to loosen the tie, kick off the heels and freshen up.
That means dinner needs to finish about 6.30pm.
Dinner and Speeches
This is where your venue’s guidance matters most, but let’s assume:
A typical dinner service takes around 90 minutes, which means guests need to be seated around 5pm.
Speeches usually happen just before dinner.
A good rough guide is 10 minutes per speaker. Some are shorter. Some… are not.
You know your friends and family better than I do.
4.15pm: guests called to dinner / 4.30pm: speeches begin / 5pm : Dinner
Ceremony and Photos
Still working backwards :
If dinner starts at 5pm, you’ll want all the photos finished by around 4pm.
That usually gives enough time for three simple things:
• a few family group photos
• relaxed portraits of the two of you
• time to mingle with guests during drinks
Most couples find about 90 minutes works well for this part of the day.
Not because you’ll be standing in front of a camera the whole time, but because it gives the day a bit of breathing space. Time to say hello to guests, have a drink, and step away together for ten quiet minutes before dinner begins.
If you want to know there is a wee blog post breaking that down into a bite sized read
That’s why ceremonies often land around 1pm–2pm. It gives the whole afternoon space to breathe.
Rough ceremony lengths:
- Civil ceremony (registrar): 20–30 minutes
- Church of Scotland (at venue): 20–30 minutes
- Church of Scotland (at church): 30–45 minutes
- Catholic ceremony: 60–70 minutes
- Humanist ceremony: 30–60 minutes*
*Be guided by your Humanist on timing….then add 10 minutes, because they’re lovely people but they do like to talk.
The One Thing That Can Derail Everything
There’s one supplier I haven’t mentioned yet. And without any malice at all, they can knock your entire day sideways. Hair and makeup.
This is not a dig. Many HMUAs are close friends of mine and absolute pros. But timing here is critical.
If this runs late, the whole day suddenly becomes a sprint.
Hair and makeup should be finished at least 45 minutes before the ceremony.
This gives you time to
- get dressed without flapping
- take a breath breathe
- have a glass of something nice and enjoy the way everything is coming together
At that point in the day, you look incredible and we dont want that rushed
Now Run It Forward
Still with me? Now take all of those timings and run them forwards:
The morning feels calm.
Hair and makeup finishes early.
The ceremony isn’t rushed.
Photos have breathing space.
Dinner runs smoothly.
And by the time the evening starts, everyone is ready to celebrate.
Not recovering. Celebrating. And that is what you will remember.
